When you go to a restaurant, especially if it's one you haven't been to before, you'll want to take a look through the menu in great detail in order to see what floats your boat.
If you're a picky eater, then the more descriptive the menu is, the better. I mean, if a dish has got peas in it and you can't stand the nasty little green brutes, you're going to want to know.
However, some menus which are not originally written in English have a tendency of unknowingly including false translations. And that's putting it mildly - often these mistranslations are beyond ridiculous and borderline offensive.
Here are 18 epic menu fails which are guaranteed to put a smile on your face.
1. Germany sexual harassment
I'll have some Germany sexual harassment, please. With a side order of well-deserved lawsuit.
2. F*ck the duck until exploded
What other way is there to "f*ck the duck"?! Literally none.
3. "I can't find on google but it's delicious"
Now there's an honest translation if ever I saw one. Who the f*ck cares what the actual meal is, we'll just take their word for it that it's delicious, shall we?
4. "Should we include our great nation's main delicacy on the menu?" "Whatever..."
There are no f*cks given on this menu.
5. Stir-fried Wikipedia
Someone should make these into actual Wikipedia pages. It's high time the world knew what "stir-fried Wikipedia", "stir-fried Wikipedia with pimientos" and "steam eggs with Wikipedia" were.
6. Ice cream in the ass
Personally, I prefer "ice cream in the mouth", but hey, who's judging?
7. Who doesn't enjoy roasting their husbands?
For those who don't like their husbands deep fried.
8. "I'm hella broke so I'll take the cheap chicken option. You know, the one that isn't "real". Please, and thank you."
This should be an interesting surprise...
9. When being eaten is totally on the menu...
What kind of sick establishment is this?
10. Oh, just f*ck a bullfrog would you?
And you want to know what the really hysterical thing is? There isn't a hint of bullfrog in the dish. None at all...
11. Get the sweetest ass in all of China right here:
Erm, whose sweet ass? Our sweet ass - duh!
12. We've all wanted to grab a 500 ml cock right?
I mean, it's definitely on my bucket list...
13. Various and confused pizzas
Hey, some people like their pizzas "various and confused" and some people like them "few and in the know". It's a personal choice like any other.
14. Can you guess what's wrong with the menu?
Well, they accidentally included a photo of USB sushi. Amateurs...
15. It's a bit of a rogue choice but I like my cat ears meat fried
Also, did you know that "fries pulls out the rotten child"? Well, you do now...
16. Deep fried baby, anyone?
It's a bargain at 50kr.
17. Meat muscle stupid bean sprouts
The stupider the bean sprouts, the better.
18. Sweet, tight pussy anyone?!
No way is that a mistake...
So there you have it: the most hilarious menu translations in restaurant history. They've been risque, they've been outrageous and most importantly, they've been absolutely hysterical.